It's Back to School

Have you ever thought of how many times you have cried on behalf (or because) of your children.  For some reason that has been the spark of conversation the past few days.  Probably because school started.  I will admit, there were no tears from this lady on the first day of school.  There was a large smile, many pictures and a big wave, C YA LATER LADIES!!!! 

I'm sure that doesn't sound like a compassionate mother, but we were in need of structure.  And we are feeling the love again.  Aren't they cute!!!  First day of school, Looking Good!!!

Anyway, back to my other thought, tears and all the reasons they are cried.
You cry when your children are born..............when they get their first shots..................when they leave for school the first time (sometimes when they move to another school).............when you leave them with a sitter (even if the sitter is grandpa and grandma. I know I have issues).............when they get hurt..............when they get hurt and you aren't there to comfort them.............when they call you at work because they are fighting...........when they slam a door in your face...........when they cry because they miss someone..........when you can't take the hurt away........you want to cry when they take clothes from your closet and then realize the clothes look better on her than you ****sigh****   You get the picture.  I am amazed how someone of various sizes (they range for 3"1' to 5"9" over here) can carry such power. Not all those tears are happy ones.  Some are anger or irritation.  And to think of everything you cry over there are more moments of laughter and smiles. 

 I have the privilege of having the twins home 1 more year.  Over the summer they have really grown up and I was thinking, maybe I should've sent them to preschool.  Then the 1st day of school came.  They got up and said, "what are we going to do today?"  I explained their sisters were at school and they both smiled and said, "We know!"  Stinkers!!  We did have a good day.  It was time everyone had a break from the closeness and venture in our routine again.  Next year I am planning on more tears.  I pretty sure when I send them off, I will have to be alone due to embarrassment of not being able to hold it together :)  But that's a year away.   We'll enjoy the next year and have more laughter than crying, but with 6 ladies in the house, watch out. 

Been awhile since I updated.  I am always busy, but not sure with what. (I think it has something to do with the kids :) We went camping, that's always fun because of the people we go with.

Brooke went to the MD and she is growing, whoo hoo. She is officially on the growth charts. That's a good feeling.
Here is Brooke eating corn on the cob.  We had AMAZING corn from my grandpa.  Brooke ate it for 2 nights and then cried when it was gone.  Sometimes I wish I could get in her brain to see what she actually thinks about food.  I am confused!

 We had the privilege of going horse back riding with friends.  Our friends daughter was engaged. (now she's married) Our plan, with this gaggle of girls, was to have some sort of bridal shower when they get engaged.  Well, because us mom's are so young and fun, hehe,  and playing silly games wasn't on our list of fun this summer, our friend Missi decided horseback riding was the fun of choice.  And it was fun!  No one got hurt, we laughed and we got to wear really cool hats.

 These are some of my friends :)  Me, Tricia and Missi.  A long long time ago, Steve and I were dating.  Phil and Tricia were married.  They had a baby and Steve asked if I wanted to go visit them in the hospital.  I said, "sure."  I'm a social person.  Their baby was beautiful!   Tricia, who didn't know me, was all smiles and said, "do you want to hold my baby?"  I actually made Steve hold her :)  That was the beginning of the friendship of the 3 of us.  Our husbands have been friends since their early years of school.  It's amazing and I thank God for bringing us together. 
And look at the little "baby."  She is gorgeous!  We were so blessed to witness their marriage.  Their smiles, laughter and loved SHINED!!!  Congrats Troy and Kelsey!!  May God Bless you and your marriage forever!

Withering!!!!

Have you ever done something, only to have it not turn out?  Like baked something but it's flop.  Or did a craft only to find out you missed a step and it doesn't look like it should.  You get the point.  You did the work but the end result didn't turn out.   Now on a bigger scale, imagine planting thousands of acres of crops, hundreds of hours of labor, only to not get rain and see them wither before your eyes.  That's what all these poor farmers are going through. The end result is out of their control.   It's a trickle affect.  Obviously it's the farmers and family's livelihood, it's the consumers food source, etc etc. 
Steve and I headed to Chicago this weekend.  A little anniversary get away.  Steve thought seeing pavement might be easier than dried up crops.  We had fun, alot of people watching (a very cheap and extremely entertaining past time), we also went to Museum of Science and Industry (where he found a combine).  We took the train, but once we got our van we "crop toured."  You can take the farmer out of the country, but you can't take the country out of the farmer. 

 All in all, we know where we belong.  We had a great time getting away, but we are at home right where God put us, with 5 amazing ladies.  Steve is doing well, despite the drought.  Obviously rain would make us very happy, but we are aware it's in God's hands.  Rain or Shine God is in control and will take care of us all. 

Rant

I must rant and rave once more. I am sure you are all getting sick of hearing about feeding issues. Thus am I! Yesterday we went to feeding clinic. I had low expectations. Why get my hopes up right? Brooke brought "her" food and Leah and I snuck in yogurt because the therapist said she had to try something challenging. So, we get there, and we all went in to have a "picnic." It actually went GREAT! Brooke ate the yogurt she was required to, she let me feed her and then she ate most of a pancake. I was floating I was so excited!!! So supper time came. I figured, "let's do this!" The kid would not do ANYTHING! She got ice cream taken away because she wouldn't take a few bites of potato's. She screamed at me, she spit at me (yes I said spit). So we told her when she ate it, she could have ice cream. I stood and did dishes last night and had all I could do not to cry. Steve would look at me and I'd shake me head and he'd walk away. So, once I regained my composure (and kids were in bed) I was once again, physically and mentally exhausted about food. It's all so dumb! Steve is so sweet and supportive but we both agree, this sucks.

Morning comes, Brooke gets up, walks to the counter and said, "where are my potato's?" I said I threw them away and we were going to start over today. She said, "good idea." Really!?!?! The only thought that continues to run through my head is, "She Won!" I was out smarted, AGAIN, by a 4 year old. I left for work, Ashley said, "what do we feed her." I said, "I am at work, don't tell me what you eat and I won't know." So I am sure they ate junk all morning, but at supper I told her, she had to eat her bites or she couldn't leave the table. That went better. She did eat. I am realizing she does not want to eat casseroles, noodles, rice. It's usually fruit and bread. So, I guess we just keep trying. I will try to no longer cry over my dishes and we will start new every day. "His mercies are new every morning!" Praise the Lord!

The one good thing out of this, is the girls have STRICT instructions they may not complain about what we eat. (Someone is always complaining about gross food at our house) So it's fun to see how they are getting creative about their dislikes. They are troopers. We haven't weighed Brooked yet, (next week) so we hope to then figure out if the tube feedings and small appetite are sustaining her growth. I hope so because I really don't want to increase her tube feedings. But we are all aware its not in our control. What ever is best for Miss Brooke will be done. Thanks for listening :)

A Happy Heart

I don't have alot to say. (unusual :) Just a happy, full heart! Happy Birthday Sweet girls! Love you to the moon and back! 2 Corinthians 5:7 For we walk by faith, not by sight.

Life Goes on!

Summer is flying by. We have birthdays galore coming up. Brooke got up this morning and said, "2 MORE DAYS TIL MY BIRTHDAY!!!" Macy yells, "ME TOOO! AND WE WILL BOTH BE THIS MANY!" (4) I said, "why are you both 4?" They looked at each other and said, "I don't know." They are their own individual people. I am not even sure they know they are twins. Macy claims they can't be twins because she is bigger. A LONG time ago, like when Steve and I were dating, I told him I wanted 2 kids. That's all! No more! He said that he wanted 4. So we compromised on 3. Well, after our 3rd I really wanted 1 more. So, God gave us 2. Now that the twins are 4 years old (almost) I said to Steve, "just 1 more?" I got no comment, hehe. No concerns, we will not have anymore children. I wasn't completely serious :) My age is against me, along with a full house, van and schedule. My question is, how can you go from being very adament about having 2 children, to thinking that 5 children is not alot. I think when you are in the midst of chaos it just becomes normal. Speaking of children, I must relay my frustration with one of mine. Due to camping and having alot of children, Brooke missed 2 weeks of therapy. No concerns right? She's doing ok, not eating full meals but making progress. So I was excited to go to feeding clinic and tell them about her progress. We get there and she did head in without crying. She came out, because she had to go to the bathroom. Ok, we do that. Then the water works start! Crying, screaming, saying she "CAN'T", she "WON'T", etc etc. Macy and I watched through a window. The therapist was so patient with her and kind, in a very calming voice. Well, my blood was boiling and I was not a happy mama! The therapist comes out and says, "she did well, she ate 2 bites of applesauce, we just needs to catch up because we missed 2 weeks." Catch up my butt!!! So we get the van, I say nothing!! Brooke is trying to say things, I told her I was not interested in speaking to her now and nothing was said the whole way home. We got home and she said, "you're mad at me." Darn tootin I'm mad at you! I explained she is wasting our time. So it's lunchtime, she wants ice cream, I say, fine as soon as you eat a sandwich. So she eats it. 3/4 of a grilled cheese. Supper was a struggle but she did try the rice, at 8pm finally. It's a funny texture. Breakfast, she wanted french toast. And she ate 1/2 a piece of the french toast. So we go back to feeding clinic Friday. We'll see what she does. She is making progress, just doesn't want to show anyone I guess. Good thing these kids are cute :)

Insanity

That word pretty much sums up my life. I N S A N I T Y!!! I was so happy to see school come to an end. One less thing on my plate. The girls had commented their grades went down the end of the semester. Ashley said, "don't worry I told my teacher we don't study spelling words anymore in the Spring." Oh boy, we need a sensor sometimes :) So schools done, but we still had softball almost every night. Really, is that many games necessary? But when I looked on the calendar I saw a week of camping. PRAISE THE LORD, a break!!!! The day before we left for camping we had a ball game (go figure). It was Ashley's last one and an early one. I dropped off Leah at her destination, picked up Steve and we were off to t-ball. We watched the game, (even brought the dog, daring). As we were packing up we folded up chairs and guess who stuck their finger in their chair? Yup, Brooke! Oh the screaming. I wanted to look at it to see what was going on and Steve was rapidly shooing everyone in the van, getting very irritated and being short with us. When we got in the van I looked at him and he cranked on the air conditioner and he was all white. Then I got it, blood! There was blood, Steve doesn't do blood! So after a few phone calls, Brooke and I headed to the "spa" for a quick finger check. Nothing was broken, just a mangled up finger, mangled nail, dressing changes and antibiotics. She's doing well with it. (Steve's ok too, silly boy :) When we got home I sat on the couch and said, "when we actually leave for camping we leave. No more rushing." I like to be prepared and organized and I hadn't even started to pack, or get groceries. As always, everything fell into place and we were off and camping the next day. We so needed the lack of schedule. Camping was great! The kids had fun. They ran on a sugar buzz all week, which came to my disadvantage when we got home and the sugar wore off. Heavens to Betsy, it was a rough 24 - 48 hours. Re-programming children is not for the weak. Now we are home and according to my calendar it looks like we have sports camps. Why do I do this? My thought process was, I'd let each kid do 1 thing. Then I wouldn't get so busy. When you have 3 kids in things and Brooke's therapy, that makes it busy. So it just comes down to having alot of kids. It is what it is. I wouldn't change any of them and if I didn't have them I would be bored. Our dog! For some reason he liked to lay in the (non hot) fire pit. Yes, we took the dog camping. It actually went well. Brooke eating! She actually ate more than candy this week. She ate a whole smore, tried some lasgna, banana bread and more. Everyone we camped with were amazing in feeding my grazing girl :) Megs and her friends! Leah was too cool to let me take a picture of her. She probably knew it'd end up on here. The ladies laying on the laundry after we got home. It was quite comfy.