Better Together

I was recently talking to an elderly man.  Very elderly.  He asked me, "have you met my wife?"  I said, "no not yet."  He said, "well, you see that dried cherry all wrinkled and small."   Hmmmmmmm, "yes I do."   (where was this conversation going)  "that's what my wife looks like. Tiny, small, wrinkly and the most beautiful thing you've ever seen.  I can't wait for you to meet her." 

I thought that was the strangest but sweetest analogy I've ever heard.  One reason I LOVE working with elderly, there are so many success stories.  And if you listen, there is so much to learn.  On how to love each other unconditionally and grow old gracefully, with a good sense of humor. 

The other day I pulled my hair back and Leah was like, "WOW MOM!"  WOW was right.  There wasn't a few grey hairs, their were clumps.  I am by no means the fashion queen.  (I had to borrow a friends clothes a couple weeks ago to look "classy").  I'm just me, and I like that.  But this grey hair thing, I am not a fan of.  So I called another friend that took care of the grey hair.  (good thing for friends :)

My point is, you can't stop this aging thing and there is no reason to.  It's the way God intended us to be.  As a mom, I want my girls to see us do it gracefully, embrace it, and with a good sense of humor. Every wrinkle has a memory.  Every grey hair must have something to say.  I pray Steve and I make it to the age of that couple.  And if so, I know we'll be more in love than ever.  Some things just continue to get better with time. 

Parenting Fail

Not sure what everyone elses kids do when they get home from school, but mine unwind.  Play a game, watch tv, today the youngest 3 played house.  I let them.  I figure they are entitled to relax and have some fun. Well, I've never had a child struggle in school, til now.  Ash always has something else on her brain, besides what she's doing.  So she rushes through things and rarely gets things right.  However it doesn't seem to bother her. 

So today she played, we ate supper and then she explained the pile of homework she had to do.  So we sat her down to get started.  Steve went out side, a few children followed him and we heard the snowmobile going.  Ashley was devastated!  So we struck up a deal.  1 math paper was all she had to do.  She was so frustrated she couldn't even add simple problems.  She finally got her bearings, we finished the paper, she got her snow stuff on and had the BIGGEST smile and said, "THANKS MOM!"  She's so happy!  This is a child that NEEDS the outdoors.  So, to say the least, not all the homework is done, but Ash is calm and happy.  And I'm hoping she can focus enough to read before bed.  If her teachers read this, I apologize :)  But I know they'll understand.

 

Love!

I dare say Brooke is pretty much healed.  A week after he surgery this is her.  In the snow and playing with her sisters (and dad :)  She wasn't about to miss out on the fun any more.  We are so blessed on her speedy recovery and good attitude.  She has her moments.  We call it "Princess syndrome" and we are working to rid ourselves of this yucky syndrome.  She might be the youngest, and we'll agree, she had a rough start, but she's here and as healthy as she's going to be, so she's starting to get over herself :)  Tough love!

We can't thank people enough for all the prayers, cards, gifts and meals we had.  The support always amazes us.  There is no much good in this world and so many kind, loving people.  We are so blessed!

 



 With all the snow days Brooke didn't miss any school, due to her surgery.  So that worked out better than we ever could have expected.  As much as the kids were sick of being home they kept very busy. 
Macy lost her first tooth! Thank goodness the tooth fairy was able to make it out in the bad weather.  We've had to have some talks with the older girls explaining the tooth fairy can be "real" to a 5 year old and let's not burst her bubble just yet.  Let her believe in the magic for a little while :)

The other girls kept busy with crafts and baking.  Megan made a diaper cake for a friend of ours having a baby this spring.  She also made a quilt that she's going to give to someone and went to great grandma's and made herself a maxi skirt.  That girl has some talent.

Ashley baked EVERY DAY!  Not just box stuff, she went for the real butter and cocoa.  Oh boy is all I can say!  Once they went  back to school I had to dust off my treadmill after all that eating.  She asked the other day if she could bake and I said, "NO!  Not till I can get my jeans back on."  Another talented little lady.  So happy they were able to channel all that snow day energy into doing something.

Once school started Ashley had market day.  I love that day!  The kids get to make something.
They have to figure the costs, what it'll take to break even and then they all sell their products.
The kids have such great ideas.  Ashley made stress balls, which after all the snow days I think
the parents were wanting to buy them. She sold out and made a profit of $18.00.  They also all
donate a certain percent.  What a valuable lesson!




 Last is making the best of this season!  Steve got Megan out skiing.  He took her on Tuesday after school with a friend and her dad.  To our surprise on Friday she was back out there with her friends.  Steve went with Friday just to make sure she did ok, but he texted me, "haven't seen Megs in 1 1/2 hours. She's having a riot!"  Yeah Megan!  We are excited for her because she was SOOOO Scared to ski but finally decided she wanted to try.   So to watch her overcome this fear and enjoy it so much is fun!  This is the perfect year to learn :)

 It's fun to watch the girls at their stages of life.  Learning new things and enjoying life.  Saturday night Steve and I went away over night.  The girls wanted to stay home alone.  Our initial reaction was, "no!"  But then after thought we said ok.  Leah had a friend over and grandpa and grandma were right next door.  The girls had soooo much fun which I am so happy about.  They CAN get along if the want to :)  What made me laugh more was Leah.  Her comment when we got home, "do you know how many dishes get dirty in 24 hours? I did the dishes 3 times!"  I think it's ok when we leave.  They NEED to learn, Steve and I are not as lazy as they think we are.  We actually do things around here!    Love these ladies!!

Day 3

So we are 3 days after surgery.  The weather hasn't hindered us much, because we didn't plan to go anywhere any way.  Brooke's mornings are a little rough.  Our plan was to wake her at midnight give her pain meds and then let her sleep.  Well, she doesn't want to wake up at midnight and she surely won't take any meds at that hour.  So she's been waking up at 5am, very unhappy and painful. She still has trouble with painful urinating, but if we have pain meds on board she is well.  Usually by 10:00 am she's feeling better and her "normal" self, just a little slower. 
The unusual thing that happened is, she had a fever this morning.  Brooke has never had a fever, we didn't think she could get one, but she may have proved us wrong.  According to her discharge instructions this is not uncommon to get a fever.  But if it continues then we'll have to let them know.  No worries thus far.  Steve was kind of excited, something normal she's doing. 
Brooke was a little sad today that everyone was on the snowmobile but her.  We all took turns staying inside with her and she told me she was feeling good enough to ride too.  Silly girl..............I don't think so!!!!!
We've been surviving the snow just fine.  Living in the country you just expect things like this to happen.  It's a fun adventure.  Most of our roads have been closed at one time or another.  We just bundle up and walk around in the snow.  The fresh air is amazing and it's so beautiful outside.  God's country :)

Home!

We are home!!!  Home sweet Home!  Brooke had an ok night last night.  She was up often but in a great mood.  At 3:30a she told me she was ready to go home and felt, "great." Well at that hour going home was not an option.  So she played on the Leapster and hung out for awhile.  I was so encouraged!  The doctors saw her and were happy with her progress.  They turned off the IV in the am and took the cath out about noon. 

 We headed home and were back around 2p.  We kinda hurried ourselves out because we heard the bad weather was coming and we wanted to be stuck at home and not at the "spa." Our afternoon was a little rough.  The pain was getting best of her and urinating wasn't so pleasant.  She sat on the toilet saying out loud, "I am brave, I can do this.  I am brave."  It made me smile and broke my heart at the same time.  Her sisters surrounded and loved on her! 
After supper, 7+ hours of not peeing I told her she had to go to the bathroom or there would be more tubes.  There was a resounding, "NO MORE TUBES, I am brave!"  And I've never seen a kid so happy that she pee'd :)  I then told her she needed to take 2 steps.  Only 2!  Once she got her bearings she "waddled" off as Macy says.  She's sore, but being home we have her on a pain med schedule and so far it's working.  I'm thinking we'll get her up tonight for pain meds, just to stay ahead of the pain.  She has 6 incisions on her abdomen and groin.  But she's doing it.  We'll see what tomorrow brings. It's very nice to have all these sisters to help take care of her.

It was fun to get to see the staff that cared for her (and us) for so long.  They are such wonderful caring people and we've become invested in their lives.  We want to know who's getting married, having children, becoming grandparents.  It's fun to see their lives progress.  And they were quite amazed at Brooke's growth and life accomplishments.  For the 1st time since she was 6 weeks old she is TUBE FREE!!!  YEA GOD!!!

Blessed!

Today was it.  Feeding tube removal, and some urinary reconstruction. Ready or not, it was time to get things fixed up.  We went to bed with the weather being less than optimal.  But we knew we had to get there.  So we wrote all the notes out to the girls of school day agenda and snow day agenda.  And we went to bed.  We awoke to Macy Hacking up a LUNG!  She has sinus drainage and it gets the best of her when the rest of us want to sleep.  So not much sleep but adrenaline and caffeine have always worked in the past. 

Much to our surprise we drove out of the snow within 5 miles.  The roads still weren't great but not so bad.  We got Grandma Koeman up for nothing, because the girls didn't have school and could sleep in.  But she hung out with them for awhile anyway.

Here's one last good look at the feeding tube.  See ya later!!!

 Here is Brooke and her doll.  Her sisters got her all dressed up and ready for the hospital.

 They gave Brooke oral meds that made her "funny." We have some pretty good video and she was funny.  I laughed til I cried at her.  Our friend Missi came to hang out with us and was also entertained by the silliness :)  Good drugs!

 Then she was off.  We talked to the 1st surgeon after about an hour.  He removed her feeding tube and sewed all the layers back together so it lays nice and flat on her tummy.  I didn't take any pictures of that because it's not so pretty yet.  But it will be :)

We then figured we wouldn't hear anything for awhile but after 45 minutes another surgeon wanted to talk to us.  That got us a little nervous.  They found 2 hernia's they weren't planning on finding and wondered if they could fix them now, rather than later.  YES!  1 stop surgery!  You fix everything that needs fixing so we don't have to do this again.

They then did her urinary surgery.  All in all it took 5 1/2 hours about.  She has a bunch of little puncture marks on her belly, steri strips, internal sutures and a catheter.  We plan to have the cath removed in the am.  As long as she pee's and her pain is controlled we go home. 

She really is a trooper and did well.  Her sisters were spoiled by the Koop's today and brought up to hang out tonight. 

 

We had a literal party going on!  LOVED IT!!  And LOVE all these people!!!  

I also LOVE this!

Isaiah 58:8 "Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear"

Joshua 1:9 "I am the Lord your God.  I will be with you everywhere you go"

John12:27 'Peace I leave with you.  My peace I give you.  I do not give to you as the world gives.  Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid."

These are verses that got texted to us through out the day from a Bible study group. Many of the ladies I know, some of them I don't, but it meant so much to us.  If you've had a child with health issues or even had your own health issues it's a strange kind of busy.  We sat there for 6 hours today.  We had time to do so many things.  But the sensible, organized part of your brain stops and all you can focus on is, "are they done yet."  So to know that others are praying for Brookie and us, brings such a sense of peace.  Not that we don't pray for Brooke. We do.  But honestly, during the hours she's not with me, I don't have the organized thoughts that I do when I am sitting here beside her watching her sleep.  We treasure every one's prayers and care.

We'll see how tomorrow goes.  Brooke would like to be home with her sisters.  1st words after surgery, "where's Macy?"  Gotta love them!

Gearing up!

Christmas is done!  As much as I LOVE to give gifts and have the Christmas parties, I am just as excited to get my house back afterwards.  I tend to get the Christmas crabby's and it lasted longer this year with the snow days.  We had some serious cabin fever. Even had the kids break out into a water fight in the kitchen.  SERIOUSLY?!?!?!?  I finished the fight by pouring water over a kids head.  She looked at me with much anger and said, "WHY DID YOU DO THAT?  YOU HAVE THE WORST PARENTING TECHNIQUE EVER!  Normal parent's ground their kids."   That comment just made me proud.  They recognize that I HAVE a parenting technique and they DON'T like it.  Maybe it'll work :)  We'll see. 
We are not back to a schedule yet.  Leah's had exams, which she has done very well with.  Good grades and doesn't seem to stressed.  And Brooke was home for a day.  We have such a hard time reading her.  She won't tell us she doesn't feel well.  She has never had a fever, she can't vomit, she has stomach aches daily and chronic diarrhea.  She was quiet for a few days and very low key.  But appears to be her normal now.  We pray for health the next week awaiting surgery.
I have the letter from insurance approving her surgery.  So it's a go from that aspect.  We have to go to her urologist tomorrow.  Her "normal" MD retired so we have someone kind of new to us.  We have met him once but he wants to see us again for "finalize plans."  I'm praying for no more bumps in this road but I'm not holding my breath.  If I said I had no reservations I'd be lying but I keep praying God will lead us down this path.   I have become aware my plans are not always His plans and His are always better. 
May 1, 2009 Brooke went into surgery to have her nissen and G tube place.  She came out looking fire red and bloated.  I have pictures that I have a very hard time looking at.  I VIVIDLY remember standing over her crying.  Crying for the pain she was in, how she looked, the feeding tube that I SOOOOO did not want her to have. 
We are not looking forward to this surgery.  No parent wants to put their child through this.  I'm frightened for her to be in pain.  She is EXCITED to get rid of the feeding tube, but the urinary surgery is another story.  So we just need to have patience and know she is again/always in God's hands.  We praise Him for how far we have come in this journey.  We will keep you posted how surgery goes next week.