Update on medical mysteries!

 I've thought about posting a few times but things are always changing!!!

The easy update is Ash.  They tried one med, it did nothing.  She passed out 8 times in March.  We saw her neurologist this week and he started a new med.  I have a lot of confidence in his advice and hope this works.  We will just stay the course and keep her upright.  5:30 am thuds on the floor need to stop.

Then my dad.  We've been to a few doctors, and have a few plans.  Pulmonary did another sleep study and will be starting him with a bipap machine at night.  He's not a huge fan of this, but if it helps he's willing to try.  He's been to a couple cardiologist, and they feel it's definitely his valve.  It was last replaced 12 years ago.  Why it went bad so fast, we will never know.  They have some theory's but no evidence.  In the end, he needs a new one.  His current valve is a pig valve, they will be replacing it with a cow valve.  But this will require open heart.  He said 12 years ago, "I will never do this again."  At that time, his grandkids were small and he wanted to see them grow up, and 10-15 years looked like a long ways away.  Well, here we are.  He told me at the office as he signed the papers for surgery, "I said I wasn't going to do this again."  I asked, through tears,  why he was doing it?  Our family by no means wants him to do something he doesn't want to, even though we aren't ready to let him go.  He said, his grandkids aren't babies anymore, but they have more growing to do.  Some of the girls have boyfriends, he wants to see where that goes.  He has 2 graduating from college soon and 3 graduating from high school soon. He has farming yet to do. He has a wife to continue to bug 😃  It comes down to, we all feel, God isn't finished yet.  There is still a plan for his life.  We have seen him feel better since he's been home, with med changes and a plan.  I think we are more at peace having him home and a plan.   Surgery was scheduled for this week, but due to some lab results and an illness, it's been pushed back.  We are praying he can push through this illness and will carry on.  

We appreciate the kindness and prayers and will keep you updated on this beautiful man.  God's peace and greatness is surrounding us and we will cling to Him.

  

Medical Mysteries

Have you every watched House or The Good Doctor?  It's probably my love of medicine and health care that I am intrigued by these 2 shows.  House, a cranky doctor, that has issues of his own, but can always seem to solve the most complex medical cases.   The Good Doctor, again, a doctor that has his own obstacles to overcome, has a brain to see the complex situations and find a treatment plan.  How I wish these doctors were real, and help us out right now.  

We were fortunate with Brooke's diagnosis and treatment, we did find something that worked.  She still is, and always will be, a medical mystery, but we have come to terms with that.  God has given us what we need to know, and has given us peace on what we don't. 

Unfortunately lately we are dealing with Ashley's continued fainting episodes.  So far there are no answers, and maybe there never will be.  We pretty much have been told, "she'll grow out of it."  Well at 6'2" I think we are done growing, and it's altering her life.  So we are trying to pursue more testing and see if we can get this kid a normal life.  We do make light of her situation, because others have it so difficult.  And she is fortunate to know when it's coming, so she can be sitting, or more often, we catch her.  I can't carry her around like I did when she was little, but Steve and I have gotten good at bear hugging our "little" girl and holding on tight til she comes to.  We know how much we love her and hold her tight, so thinking of how much the Lord loves her and is holding her tighter yet gives us comfort.  

Then onto the other man in my life, my dad.  They made the trip home from Florida this weekend.  Dad had health issues prior to leaving for Florida and was told warm weather and walking would help rehab.  Well, after 3 more hospitalizations, shortness of breath, more weight loss and fatigue, the above advice was wishful, but not right.  Cardiology says it's a lung issue: pulmonology says it's a heart issue.  No one is actually finding out the issue.  It's time to try something different.  The weather isn't as nice here, so they can't get outside like in Florida, but they do have determined family to try and help.  We have his name and information in at Mayo Clinic and are waiting to see if he gets an appointment there.  He also has a doctors appointment this week.  He just wants to know what he's dealing with.  When this man isn't able to drive tractors and doesn't want to eat ice cream WE HAVE AN ISSUE!!!  We pray we find answers and quickly and that God will protect him and mom through this journey.  

We are aware there is only one True Healer.  That is not House or The Good Doctor.  It's our Heavenly Father.  He is showing us His way, peace, patience and importance of being there for each other.  If you have time to pray for my parents and Ashley that would be greatly appreciated.  We have faith in Him. 

This is Ashley's motto in life :)  LOVE THIS KID!!

 

Transplant week!!!

 With transplant week upon us, I felt it was time for an update.  All the girls are living their lives to the fullest.  I don't post much because their lives are theirs, and they will post what they want, not mom's version :)  Steve and I are proud of all of them and their accomplishments, finding their passions in life.  Steve and I are here to listen, guide and direct them, loving them the whole way.  

Brooke is doing well.  She came through her sinus surgery like a champ. I wish I could say it "cured her" but that will probably never happen.  It helped her with some of her symptoms.  Brooke doesn't really complain, she just loves life.  

Last night was a first for Brooke, and comical for the rest of us. We were eating supper, all 7 of us around the table, talking about our days.  Brooke made some weird noise (not uncommon at our house) and proceeded to vomit on her plate.  We all stared at her and then started laughing.  Don't be mad at our lack of empathy, with a house of 5 girls you roll with it, and she wasn't sick.  We asked, "what are you doing?"  She was like, "holy cow I just puked!!!"  Brooke does not ever remember puking,  Steve and I remember very well.  That's all she did for about her first year of life.  Hence why they doctors did a nissen when she was almost a year old.  They did surgery and wrapped her stomach around her esophagus, so she had a one way valve.  Food only went down, not up.  Over time, some kids are able to stretch this as they grow.  We've been thinking Brooke's has been stretching, because she could now burp.  Last night we saw proof, that it's opening up.  She was pretty excited something "normal" was happening to her.  We pray this will not be an issue for her, if it is, we will just get it fixed. 

The life of the Koemans!!!  We are so excited for March 4.  It marks 12 years of uncertainty.  12 years of a wild ride with 5 kids, that are now teenagers and adults. 12 years of God's goodness.  We praise God daily for everything He has blessed us with and will continue to do so. 

                             My favorite people!!!!

     

                                                                              This is the true us :)  

No opinion!

 Is it ok, to not have an opinion?  I've seen alot of very strong opinions out there these days, about everything.  Personally I can see both sides of the COVID opinions.  What I do know is, it's not going away.  Even with a vaccine, we will still see it.  They have vaccines for whooping cough, my children have all had them and are up to date, that didn't stop my daughter from getting it, but it was a milder version. 

I feel bad for anyone that gets COVID, and they are shunned from the world.  That's got to be hard on the heart.  They feel shame and blame.  That's not right.  It's not their fault.  We don't make people that have influenza feel that way.  I think if we could get rid of social media and the news in general, life would be better.  Calmer, less anxiety.  I'm aware there is good to all of it too, however, maybe I'm just searching for simpler times.  

Do mask work?  I don't know.  I'm sure they help some things, but at the same time they are causing harm too.  It's trying to find the balance.  If someone wants to wear a mask, I want them too.  If someone feels better with me having a mask on, I will definitely do that.  If someone can't wear a mask, or doesn't want to.  I respect that as well.  If someone has health concerns, lets keep them safe, in whatever way they see fit. As loving individuals we can adapt to help each other. 

I've seen many people lately with COVID.  It's not something anyone wants.  I just think at some point they need to feel loved, cared for and human.  Not shamed for an illness they didn't ask for.  We can love each other calmly, caringly and patiently and still be safe.  

God called us all to love and care for one another.  I pray the people I am in contact with can feel that love and know I care.  And I pray each of you take the opportunity to care for each other. 

We don't always wear masks, but I must say, we did wear them before they were cool :)

 

If God can create this sky, He will see us through 2020!!

MEGS!!!!!

Here are a few pictures of our Megs!!  This is happening.  She's growing up and we can't stop it.  I'd like to describe Meg's to you. She came into this world in her own time. She's always been laid back.  She'd nap where ever she decided she was tired.  

 A teacher once told us, "Megan will never have high blood pressure.  I told her she failed a spelling test and she said, "ok, thank you."  No worry or fear. Just matter of fact."
She takes things in stride, but ask her Uncle Mark, if you get Megan mad, she will let you know :)  Hence the nickname, "silent thunder."
And when Uncle Jon got engaged, her heart broke just a little.  As much as she loves her Aunt Cassie, Uncle Jon always has a special place in her heart.
Megan has always surprised us.  When the family was being tested to see if we had a match for Brooke's bone marrow, I told Steve and I prayed, "please Lord don't let it be Megan."  Megan didn't like anything medical and I knew it was a fear.  When Megan came back a complete match, I didn't know what to think.  We told her, waiting for tears or fear.  And she just said, "ok that sounds good, I'll do it."  There were never any tears.  She perservered and carried on like a true champion.  It has brought a wonderful bond between her and Brooke.  I do remember one fight they had, and Brooke was being very nasty.  Megan said, "if wasn't for me you wouldn't be alive so you better be nice."  I was amazed this came out of Megs!  But I couldn't help but laugh because it was true and Brooke definitely changed her attitude.

As I reflect on this last year, I've cried more than once. Why did senior year have to be so unfair? So many fun things, that never got to happen. And it's not the same to try and re create them.  However she has been gracious, and even though disappointed, she's carried on.  

Megs, dad and I couldn't have asked for a more amazing 2nd daughter!!!  You are kind, caring and hard working.  No matter how crazy our house gets,  you always have your sisters back.  You have shown, you will, and have, dropped everything for family and true friends

  You're priorities are right.  God's got your future all figured out!!  Follow Him!!  We can't wait to see what He has in store for you.  And dad and I are ALWAYS here for you, with open arms!  I can always use a Meggie hug!  You're the best, sweet girl!  Let you're light shine!!

The Real Hero's

Here we are, still on the stay at home order.  I'm sure we have all heard ENOUGH about it.  I know I have.  What I keep hearing about are the "essential" workers and the "hero's."  I can't speak for anyone but myself and what I see at my own home.  But I feel the real "hero's" are all these sweet kids that have had their lives turned upside down, the elderly and immunocompromised people scared to go out or have loved ones visit.
I know in our own home there have been lots of different emotions.   "Homeschool" is not all rainbows.  The twins get it done and plunge on through.  The high schoolers are another story.  And I can't blame them.  I want to tell them, "just forget it," but that's not good parenting :)  They need to finish strong and they are learning what self discipline is all about. 
They all miss their friends, and we are slowing back into that.  You can only keep kids in lock down for so long!! 
We are still waiting to hear about, graduation, prom and open houses.  And Megan has been very gracious about everything being "taken away." 
One of our girls was mowing the lawn recently and came into the house and said, "when I have kids I want there to be a race track and dead grass in my yard too.  It means they are making memories."  Our go cart is getting alot of riding time these days.  Last week the kids went "mudding" in Uncle Brent's field.  I'm sure he had a mess to clean up.  But it's so important, in my mind, to let these kids be kids right now.  Let them ride the go carts, golf carts and 4 wheelers til the grass is dead.  Let them play in the dirt and in the creek.  Let them eat on the couch and ease up on some of the rules.   I feel like so many things have been taken away, we need to give them the small things. 
As a nurse, I do not feel like a hero.  We have been trained to work in pretty much any situation.  We know going into this profession how to take precautions and our risks.  I'm married to a farmer, that also, just keeps working.  No matter what the circumstances, whether good or bad, they just keep going.  We have jobs.  So many other people do not!!!
But our kids, they weren't, nor should they have been, prepared. (with the exception of Brooke kind of ), she now lives in a state of fear that we had protected her from before all this. They have learned to wear masks, stay home and do everything virtually.  I hope this all goes away soon, so we can camp and have a great summer with friends.  Until then, feel free to drive by our house and marvel at our dead grass and "race track."  We take pride in the small things. 

                                                  Macy's 3 gallon bucket of ice cream!

                                                                              Campfires

                                                         Basketball

12 years!!!

12 years ago we went in for an ultra sound.  I'm sure most of you have heard the story.  We brought the 3 girls with us to "see" their new sibling.  The tech asked Steve to sit down.  He responded "I know there are twins in there."  (I didn't have his same feeling)  The tech said, "I need to make sure there aren't more than 2."  I broke out in hives and cried.  Not a happy cry, but a fearful cry.  Why would God give us twins?  I don't know how to do this, we don't have money for this, I'm gonna mess this up.  Steve smiled and was calm.  Assured me we could do this.  No worries. He did agree it might be a financial stretch but we'd figure it out.  I was definitely questioning God's decision.

I had no idea how our life would be.  But as people are in quarantine these days, I'm able to watch 2 girls, that are best friends.  Steve and I couldn't help but laugh tonight at them, laughing, chasing each other, biking, playing on the tramp, playing cards and just being there for each other.  Now, obviously, it's not always this way, but God SOOOOOOO knew what He was doing.  Why do we question God's decisions and greatness?  I don't know, but I know in the past 12 years, I've learn how amazing He is, and how following His leading is so rewarding and better than my best laid out plans.